What a forever memory feels like...

What's on your list of forever memories?
You know, those memories that will stay with you for all time.

I'm sure that I have more than I think I do, but this last weekend added one of the best.
See? Jen has it easy. She gets to feel my little girl kick and twitch and do somersaults, but baby's still too small for me to feel. I've seen pregnancy test sticks, I've seen pictures, I've watched ultrasound video, but nothing can compare to replacing my prized "high-five" picture (see the pictures) with the real thing!

Ok, not exactly the real thing. Mk1's not out of the launcher yet, but she did give daddy's hand a bump on Sunday night.

It's like crack. Just the one time, and all I want to do is press my hand harder against Jen's belly just to feel another bump. Of course, that's when Jen says enough - right before I cause permanent bruising or a bladder accident!

I might forget the way we had the living room set up; I might forget the movie that we were watching while laying on the couch (it was Nick and Nora's Infinite Playlist); but I'll never forget that first little brush against my hand.

60.67% baby :)
and we're less than 10 million seconds!!!
(9, 515,000 to go...)

Introducing...

Mk1 Mod1 in the Launcher!!!!
weesawdababy eetsagirl!

It's hard to describe the feeling when you're looking at your daughter squirm around on a computer screen. I think that our wedding day still beats it, but it was pretty cool.

Then there was the extreme coolness of using megahertz frequency sound to image my wife's insides. yeah, it's an acoustics student's dream

So I refrained from demanding acoustics answers from the very nice tech that performed the ultrasound and sat back to enjoy looking at my daughter (and the inside of my wife I guess) from every angle, all the while trying to figure out what I was looking at.

In all there were 8 pictures that we got printed. The picture of her face is a little bony and scary looking, so I didn't include it here, but staring into the eyes of the picture, I see the face of Jen. She has Jen's chin and jaw (clearly seen in the bony outlines). I know this all sounds a little weird, but trust me, she's beautiful...Jen's convinced that she has my deep sunken eyes.

I love the picture of her hand. It makes me think of how big my hand will be compared to hers.

I love the picture of her miniature broad, flat foot. Just like daddy's.

I love the picture of her laying in the cozy curled up "fetal position" So snug and comfy.

Only 10,200,000 seconds remaining!!!

57.81% baby...

We're starting to go shopping for baby stuff now.

We seem to have this crazy knack to decide on the most expensive of everything, carefully justifying the upgraded purchase with every possible reason.

SHE NEEDS THE SUPER BABY BOUNCER SWIVEL SEAT MP3 PLAYER SLEEPER OKAY!!!

It really is amazing what you can find when you go to Target...

One day, it will all come together, and our office will be a nursery. Oh what a beautiful day it will be! When our garage will be full of all the stuff we no longer have room for...

I feel like I'm becoming a real dad now :)

until then, we'll keep counting the seconds, and moving the boxes, and watching the belly get bigger, waiting for that first kick that I get to feel.

This stuff is cool :)

Back in the saddle again

At long last!

Thank you to all of our followers, we love you :)

Have you been counting?

We have.

48.5% baby,

12,450,000 seconds left!!

We're beginning to see what the nature of family life in the Navy is all about. Being out to sea is tough for communication; it's tough for family; and it's all a little new to us because we weren't married and living together last time.

My Facebook status today says it all though. "Rolling with the changes...thanks REO."

It all comes down to attitude. Jen has started to attend a women's group Bible study about "Loving your Military Man" focused on how to improve the military marriage relationship. Part of her "homework" is to discuss certain topics at home to identify ways to improve our relationship. The continuing theme for us as we go through the questions is that, no matter what happens, we're committed to each other and we know that God will not give us more than we can handle.

Now's the time in the pregnancy where other people start noticing the baby bump and questions start coming. The strangest thing, and most unexpected by far, is that now is also the time when the baby horror stories start coming out. "My baby pooped this," "My little one threw up that," "I woke up every 45 minutes through the night," and my favorite, "My baby just didn't poop at all for 5 days, and the doctor said that it was normal." The nice thing about having the baby at this time of our lives is that we've gotten the chance to get exposure to parenting from all of our friends with kids. If we've learned one lesson more than any other, it's that every kid is different. Yeah, we'll get poop; we'll get peed on; we'll have smelly baby syndrome; and, God willing, Jen will clean it all up (hehehe). No sweat.

The saddest story of the week came from bad pregnancy news about a new friend of ours here in Hawaii. A lot of people have asked us if it makes us nervous about our own pregnancy, but it doesn't. After the first miscarriage, we learned that God provides according to His purposes. My memory verse for the week is Psalm 33:10-11, "The Lord foils the plans of the nations, he thwarts the purposes of the peoples. But the plans of the Lord stand firm forever, the purposes of his heart through all generations." We are full of confidence that whatever happens will not change the fact that God is in control, and we're okay with that.

If nothing else, the course of our lives leading up to each other has convinced us of that.

And with those deep thoughts, let me leave you with this smile:

Best quote: "Ahh...twins, how nice"

Dedicated worker, jealous husband

31.75% baby, that I still haven't seen yet...

Today, the battle to maintain an even keel on the Life-Work balance totally failed.
As with most new jobs that involve some level of authority, the sense of ownership required of the successful can be overwhelming. So there I was today: torn between not having completed the tasks that I needed to accomplish; stuck between meetings; and not able to accompany my wife to her first pre-natal physical exam.
The appointment went well. Jen learned that the nurse practicioners do not perform births, contrary to what we were told at the Makalapa Clinic. It's a shame because Jen seemed to like today's nurse-practicioner a lot. She also learned that the midwives can administer some drugs, so we're planning on meeting a few of the midwives and getting some exposure to the differences between their philosophy and that of the standard doctor.

For those of you that may worry that we're going to have the midwife help with the birth at home in the bathtub with nice scented candles and the like, don't. God-willing, we'll be in the hospital for the birth, and all will be normal.

Without some of the more gory details, the appointment today involved two things that make Noble something something...
1. The team decided to run a glucose test on Jen, so she had to drink this orange soda stuff and come back in an hour. I want some orange soda :(
2. YET AGAIN, they decided to do an ultrasound. Surely there would be pictures this time!

No orange soda, and NO PICTURES make Noble something something...
GO CRAZY!!!

With my luck, by the time we have the gender revelation appointment, I'll be there and they'll decide that they don't need to do an ultrasound. The good news is that Jen is 12 wks and 5 days today which puts the due date right at 20 July. Just in time!

The question of the day is "How do you strike the appropriate Life-Work balance?"
4586 hours to go!

The awesomest let down

Sorry to disappoint you all today.
We didn't get the expected photographs of the baby today. It turns out that we weren't even going to get an ultrasound today!! It didn't matter because we were late.
It all got started when I got stuck in a class and didn't make it home to pick up Jen for our first appointment with the nurse practicioner. She finally decided to drive herself at the same time I left work. No problem! We both had half an hour to get there. The island is not THAT big, right?
WRONG!
The onramp to the highway was closed for her due to an accident. Then, the only entrance to Tripler Army Medical Center (the only military hospital on the island) was down to one lane due to road construction. Add up all the delays, the packed parking lot, the Valet Parking that closed only minutes before her arrival, and her 13 mile journey, 20 minute drive took her an hour.

Tripler AMC has a policy that if you're more than 15 minutes late, your appointment gets cancelled. For the first time in my life, I got a little snippy with the customer service. No provision is made for situations like ours where the hospital is part of the problem and they still expect you to abide by their policy.
Thankfully, I didn't act on all of the viscious, nasty things that ran through my head, but I'm still shocked at the transformation that is happening with us. As my patience gets shorter, her's gets longer.

Anyway, our next appointment is Friday where we get the full pregnancy physical. Still no pictures unless they feel they need to do an ultrasound for some reason. We only get one ultrasound as part of normal routine, so we have to wait another 8 weeks.

All the buildup and excitement for the dis-appointment.
The awesomest part of the day though started with us actually talking to the nurse-practicioner. She said that Jen needs to drink more water and that pseudoephedrine and tylenol are okay for her sinus headaches. She also got some zofran for nausea, so all that should make her feel a little better.

Oh yeah, and we got to hear the baby's heartbeat!!!
:) :) :) :) :)
Cardiac function verified!

I didn't get a hard count on the heart rate because I was holding Jen's radial pulse while listening to the baby's heartbeat and a plant was in the way of the clock.
I did see a couple of seconds go by and got a general idea.
It was somewhere around 150-160.

:) :) :) :) :)

16,860,000 seconds to go!!!
30.3% baby!

A new life

28.182% baby :)
6 months, 2 weeks, 6 days remaining...
17,384,124 seconds and counting

And, believe me. Right now, Jen is counting the seconds.
Each new second is another battle won against the nausea.
Jen's describing it as feeling like you have a bad hangover, for five weeks.

I'm still blaming, Eve, but I'm sure that Jen's suffering is "building character."
She won't let me post the pictures I've been taking of her, but I promise, they'll make great photos to go along with the line, "Look what I went through for you!"
It may seem like I'm enjoying this a little too much, but I'm still pretty excited about the prospect of being a father. Jen got me the Chicken Soup for the Soul: The Wisdom of Dads book for Christmas!

The tough part this week for me (and Jen) has been that I'm in week 3 of getting to know what life as a Surface Warfare Operations Officer is like. After 3 years of 20-40 hour weeks, the past few weeks have snapped me back into the arduous sea duty life. We're in 3-section duty for the holiday stand down, and, since I didn't take leave, I'm at work 2 out of every 3 days, spending the night in between. The good news is that I'm coming online quickly with the breadth of my responsibility. The bad news is that no one's around to get Jen the Gatorade when she's so nauseous that she can't move. This won't last for much longer, but the underway time is rapidly approaching.

For now, I'm doing my best to force her to eat something, stay hydrated, and get up and around.

THE BABY REPORT (thank you wikipedia):
-The fetus reaches a length of 8 cm (3.2 inches).
-The head comprises nearly half of the fetus' size.
-The face is well formed
-The eyelids close and will not reopen until about the 28th week.
-Tooth buds, which will form the baby teeth, appear.
-The limbs are long and thin.
-The fetus can make a fist with its fingers.
-Genitals appear well differentiated.
-Red blood cells are produced in the liver.

And now the Cowboy Lament...
my baby has a face, it is sad :(
my baby has a big head, just like most of my team.
my baby's eyes are closed, just like the Cowboys' Offense.
They won't open till well after the playoffs.
my baby's limbs are long, thin, and easy to knock balls out of
my baby has a fist and is shaking it in anger

Thank God for other sports, like hockey...
oh wait...nevermind.

My baby's blood is rising!!!

We wish you all a continued Mele Kalikimaka and hope you enjoy the New Year's Fireworks!

The Story So Far

(from Noble's point of view)

About Nov 5th, 2008...

We missed our window this month. It's tough to try to make babies when you have to go out to sea during prime ovulation time, especially after you've been trying for a while. Silly Noble, had to go watch some ballistic missile defense, super cool missile shot. Had to get underway on the HOPPER for a week so he can get to know the DDG layout...

Oh well. There's always next month.

Jen mentions something about "...if I'm pregnant, I don't want to..."

That's not really possible.

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About Nov 8th, 2008...

It's about time to get serious about family planning again. Noble's getting ready to report to the ship and we have timing issues to consider. If we don't get pregnant soon, we may need to stop trying for a few months like we did last time. Yeah, that's no fun!

As most imprtant conversations with us go, it starts at the wrong time when one of us (i.e. Noble) thinks of the topic, and goes something like this...

Noble: "So, speaking of babies, we should talk about maybe holding off for a few months after next month"

Jen: (in the kind of soft sad tone that lets you know that it was the wrong change of topic) "I really don't want to talk about that right now..."

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Nov 12th, 2008

Noble's notorious for letting his cell phone get to the minimal charge before recharging it. He insists that it polongs the battery life, even though the battery maker will tell you that there is not a hysteresis problem with the new batteries... So today, his phone charge dies.

He has some important work to due in the Naval Surface Group, Middle Pacific, Operations Office writing instructions, trying to decipher what the future of the Navy will be, you know, matters of Naval significance. So he doesn't realize what his wife is doing. He doesn't realize that she's off with our friend Tamar about their normal errand running and island exploring. He doesn't realize that Jen has decided to buy a pregnancy test...

He certainly doesn't get the email and phone call requesting that he call her as soon as he gets the message.

Only after he gets home in the afternoon, apologizing for being a little late and not having the availability to call, and after he kisses his wife, does she show him the reality of the picture below...

Yep. That's two lines folks, and the conspicuous absence of the word "not" on the top line should explain the rest.

:)

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Nov 17th, 2008

Ok. I know that some of you will be disappointed that it took me so long do develop this, but I did come around...

I'll admit, it's a little crude yet, but I'm working on it. (let's face it, it's not in MATLAB!)

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Nov 21, 2008

The first hardest thing about being pregnant, for the guy anyway, is figuring out when to tell people that you're pregnant. We're not the kind of people to keep anything really important to just ourselves, mostly because we believe that it's important to have other people share in or help you deal with the major issues in your life.

Last time (the first time), we found out that we were pregnant at 5 weeks. Told everybody at 6 weeks as a father's day surprise, and had a miscarriage at 6.5 weeks. That was tough... We got through it as we realized that, first, we hadn't really settled into the concept that we were pregnant yet - no ultrasounds, no little heart beat, etc. - and second, that we now knew that we could get pregnant: all the pipes worked, etc.

This time, we've decided to wait a little longer. 10 weeks puts us right at Christmas. That seems like a good time :)

So now, when your good friend Mel shows up to spend 9 days with you in Hawaii, and your wife has been friends with her for 10 years, what do you say? How do you explain the discomfort, the nausea, the sleepiness, and the rest? How do you explain that tonight's not the best night to go out and that you'd rather stay home?

sigh... what other peril's await for the coolest thing ever to happen???

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Nov 25, 2008

We had to tell Mel. I mean, what a bummer to come to Hawaii, and your friend is moping around, feeling like crap, not excited to do anything. So we told her yesterday.

I like telling people! It's exciting! My baby is being assembled in the launcher! (yes, I actually said that today)

It's surprising to me how bad jen feels. It seems like she has a constant malaise with a little bit of nausea. What a bummer. :( We bought those little peanut butter cracker sandwiches and the club cracker cheese sandwiches so that she could have a simple go to snack by the bed to stave off the ickiness. I've realized how important it is to continue all the more to tell Jen how much I love her and express that I want to be around her. Because of how gross she feels, it's easy to forget and start to feel like she doesn't want me around, but I know that's not true. Were I to just leave her alone, we would both start to feel worse, and we can't have that...

The baby's heart starts pumping this week! This is awesome.

Please start praying that I'll be able to see the birth.

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25 Nov, 2008

Thank you to wikipedia and to Scott M. Gilbert for this image of the prototypical 6 week fetus.

My mom saw the movie Alien while she was pregnant with me. I can't help but think about that as I look at this picture. It looks almost exactly like the viscious little creature as it pops out of the guy's chest. Yeah, best not to let Jen dwell on this one now.

After we looked through the "What To Expect When You're Expecting" we feel more comfortable with all of her symptoms. With the exception of the vomiting, she seems to be the poster child for what to expect when you're expecting!!

Liver, lungs, arms, legs, heartbeat, mouth, ear pits, gallbladder, spleen, and pancreas all begin this week! Please pray for a robust liver, strong arms and legs, a loving and compassionate heartbeat, a small mouth to ingest less food than its parents, tonally skilled ears, and organs that function better than any other of their type.

16.03% baby....

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12 Dec, 2008

Well, we made it. Our first underway separation after pregnancy.

Imagine, if you will, that you come back to your stateroom after a 15 hour day only to read about how your wife was escorted to the hospital... That's about as far as I got before I stopped breathing and started to flip out...

Thank God for Tamar and the email. Jen's fine. The nausea and indigestion are really getting to her. It's less of morning sickness and more of all-day sickness. Thank God for Campbell's Chicken Noodle Soup.

I missed blogging about our first medical appointment! We went to the Naval Clinic (Makalapa) at Pearl Harbor where we met with an OB nurse. All of the OB doctor types are up at Tripler Army Medical Center, up on the hill. This first appointment was meant to check all the fluids, make sure we had pre-natal vitamins, to introduce us to all of the pre-natal care that is available, and then to select a medical care provider for the birthing process.

The way they do things here is to assign you to one of several teams of healthcare providers that consists of midwives, nurse-practicioners, and doctors. The team works together to maintain oversight on all of the team's patients, but you choose your particular provider based on your desire for type of birth. Midwives offer homeopathic birthing techniques. Nurse-practicioners can provide some medication like epidurals if you want it, but they cannot perform surgeries (i.e. C-section). Doctors almost entirely rely on epidurals.

Jen would like to go for natural birth, but she's not opposed to medication, so we picked a nurse practicioner. Our first appointment is Jan 5th. We'll get to have an ultrasound and get those super awesome first pics of the baby and you get to find out the gender. We've decided to find out instead of waiting for the surprise. I would say that it will be our "first ultrasound" but when Jen went to the hospital this week, they did one to make sure that the baby wasn't ectopic or anything...

(here's where I get REALLY jealous)

She got to see the heart beating!

How is it possible to be excited and frustrated and happy and jealous all at the same time? God knows. Maybe He's teaching me...

For the record... 21.76% baby. 18,927,817 seconds remaining (give or take a couple hundred thousand)